Amma loves you Ali Farzan

Everything is difficult without you

I never thought of anything without your association since you were born Ali farzan. I am facing difficulty even in studying after your departure. I cant understand the theories without thinking about you and getting an example from you. In the previous semester I understood early childhood, second language development, motivation and what ever with your reference. I was used to tell the class how I was exploring the education system here by teaching you. You were not alone in learning American geography for the first time; I was  learning that also through your textbook. Now I get blank when I read similar things. When I read adolescent theories they look strange to me. Impact of play on children looks superficial to me. All these theories seem to be coming from Mars. Or maybe God has shifted me to Mars while taking you to Heaven.

I feel isolated without you ALi Farzan. I get worried when recall that you reciprocated all my emotions here. You were used to trace my feelings and act to suit best to them. I wish you are not doing it in Heaven.I pray to God that He has made you busy in playful things. I want you to remember me and my love but I want you to be ignorant to the pain I am having without you. If God gives us pain after happiness He must have got plans to replace it with happiness. After bearing this pain I want the same or more intensity of happiness. I am sure God will give that to me by uniting us. You will find me the happiest at that time, hope you will reciprocate my feelings at that time too. Amma loves you.

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5 responses

  1. Love it

    Like

    February 10, 2014 at 12:10 pm

  2. Sukaina Kazmi

    He is in the snow you see..and every coming season. He’s in every textbook you both opened together and the many more you will read andunderstand as if he were right by your side. You did it then, try and do it now. Hold on to each memory and grow with it Isbah baji so he can grow and experience with you. He’ll be as close as you’ll believe him to be.

    Like

    February 12, 2014 at 4:15 pm

    • The fear is not finding him in textbooks and seasons any more. Hope will get over this fear.

      Like

      February 13, 2014 at 6:44 am

  3. Don’t let fear come over you Isbah Baji.Make Ali’s memories your strength and believe me ….you’ll find yourself more near to him than ever. He’s with you all the time. The time you leave for your class he”s outside standing already to walk along with you my dear sister. You might not see the foot steps by your side but listen by your heart n soul ….vision will be more clear….. Don’t lose hope my sister and be strong as you are …Ali always wants his amma to be a strong and a fighter …..!
    Now you can clearly understand his fantasy……. He created fights …..super heroes….but did you know from where he got this idea!! It was you but he was so small to describe what you are for him so he created his fantasies in which super heroes were related you you who always took victory over the wrong deeds. Isbah Baji ….love him, live him, feel him, remember him but not like a Fighter who lost battle but a fighter who wins!

    Like

    February 17, 2014 at 4:07 am

    • Sukaina Now i have realized that behaving bravely is not compulsory all that time. Sharing weaknesses does not damage the reputation. We want to show only our strengths. We are not strong all the time. its only God who is strong all the time.
      But to be honest your comment has given me strength. I should do everything to make Ali Farzan proud of his mother. You are right.

      Like

      February 17, 2014 at 4:15 am

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